Don't make me repeat myself...repeat myself!

Fill in the blank:  How many times have I told you to...not to...!  We've all most assuredly been on both the giving and receiving end of such statements. 

Countless parents in exasperation have echoed their repeated caveats to seemingly deaf ears.  Siblings have thrown down the gauntlet using such exclamations.  Tired and exhausted spouses reveal their frustration with an unspoken but an unmistakeably communicated "I can't handle this one more time!" 

I understand the desperation that is so easily accompanied with such statements.  We quickly grow weary of repeating ourselves.  In the context of this frustration, I share with you a truth that has so greatly convicted my heart today.

"Finally, my brethren, rejoice in the Lord.  To write the same things to you, to me indeed is not grievous, but for you it safe." - Phil. 3:1

A verse popularly and frequently visited by parents, teachers and pastors alike regarding the overall importance and value of  repetition and review, these words sprang into new colorful, meaningful and impacting form within my heart and mind this morning.  The point is well understood that it is quite advantageous for the recipient to here the statement multiple times.

As I'm currently a student again, I am living this daily.  Candace and I have left lectures so thoroughly perplexed about what was just presented we would jokingly say, "I'm so lost, I don't even know what I'm confused about!"  We needed review and repetition (along with several heaping portions of clarification).  I remember the professor, upon our inquiring, becoming so frustrated because we at times just couldn't grasp what he was saying.  He would therefore give up and move on, leaving us to our confusion. 

The Apostle Paul comforted the Phillipian saints, "Don't worry.  It's no problem to me at all to help you grasp this most essential spiritual necessity for your life!"  Literally, he said that it is "not grievous."  My revelation came in the realization that when I am forced to at times repeat myself, I all too often find it exceedingly grievious.  I am put out by it.  It inconveniences me.  Dare I say that it offends me; I'm better than this, right? 


I specifically refer to my interactions in my marriage.  Overall, I would view myself as a gentle, tender and caring man, sensitive to the needs of my wife - at least in the big things.....sometimes...well, at least that's my heart's intent.  The problem, as it usually is, lies in the small things, the seemingly insignificant day to day happenings. 

Reality, however, reveals that I can be gruff, coarse, callused and insensitive, whether intentional or not, towards those closest to me in my life, particularly my wife.  Do situations like this take place in your home? 

Spouse 1:  We talked about that last week, don't you remember?
Spouse 2:  Nope, I'm sorry.  Could you please refresh my memory?
Spouse 1:  (With great and dramatic sighs) I guess, but I can't believe you don't remember. We were...

To my shame, I have played the role of Spouse 1 all too many times.  In those moments, my attitude and actions cry out that simply repeating myself "indeed is...grievous"!  In the end, I boil this all down to selfishness.  Yes, at times, Spouse 2 may be culpable to an extent for not remembering, nevertheless we are accountable to Lord for our attitudes and responses.  Sadly enough, most of these scenarios are so insignificant.  In fact, I've even gotten bent out of shape simply because my wife couldn't hear me due to her physical surroundings (i.e. too much noise to where she literally could not hear me).  I know it's ludicrous, but the conviction of the Holy Spirit testifies that I indeed have gone there before.

It's my prayer for both you and myself that we would continually adapt Paul's non-grievous mindset when we deal with loved ones in all things, in the significant and trivial alike.  

"Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man." -Col. 4:6